OOTD: Freaky Friday with a Stalker

Okay, so you probably are expecting some fabulous outfit, with cute accessories and an impressive description of the labels and nice deal I got.  Sorry to disappoint, but this OOTD is my “Fabulously Frumpy” edition!  Laugh all you want at my get-up, pass judgment if you will, even tease at my choice of daywear, but this outfit caused me to fall victim of a stalker, like, for reals people, hear me out… 

OOTD Freaky Friday
Have u seen this woman? Report if spotted on the back of a moped lol

This outfit was for a purpose, three to be exact:

1. Not leave the house naked

2. Get the canon balls off to school

3. Make it to the gym…and actually sweat in it

For some odd reason, a man on a moped broke his neck as I walked to my car from dropping off my child!  ‘WTH is he looking at?!’, Ran through my mind…  Maybe I had a hole somewhere in my pants, or toilet paper on my shoe, nipple slip (loss of sensation is possible after breastfeeding, tee-hee TMI), or even a flat tire?  None of the above.  He made a U-turn, stopped in front of my car, smiled, then drove off as fast as his moped would allow him, ruff-ryder style lol!

That was only the beginning of this strange encounter.  I brushed off the weirdness, got in my car and went on my way, but before I drove out one block, here he is again, next to me.  Okay, now I know he’s playing with me, so I make a quick left turn while he had to continue straight.  He then pops up AGAIN, at the next round-about.  This made me realize two things: 1. He drove really fast around the corner to meet me here; 2. He’s following me.  Why was he following me?  I don’t know, but I was sure that whatever the reason, it wasn’t anything for the betterment of my quality of life.

So by the grace of the Bus gods, the city bus makes a stop, hallelujah!  Relieved, I patiently wait behind it, and my stalker had to proceed with traffic in his lane.  I thought for sure that was it, he had to continue with the flow of traffic and here I am sitting, waiting, letting cars pass.  Well, the bus is now off and so am I, and to my surprise, so is Mr. Moped-Stalker Man!  He pops up in my rear view mirror, which makes me swiftly pass the next car and fly through the next round about.  He catches up and rides along my side, staring and smiling in my car.  Now we are stopped, side by side, at my final round about, and my final nerve.  Instead of watching traffic and waiting for his opportunity to drive off into his sunset, he smiles, stares, waves and not in a friendly “hey I know you!”, sort of way.  He did it in a cocky, aggressive, “I have to have you and you want me”, manner.  I flipped my sun visor to my left, he just ducks his head down so I could still see him.  My god, the insanity of this, why am I so damn irresistible!?


That is the end to this story for now, sorry I didn’t take it any further for your entertainment.  Now we have to wonder: was it the outfit?  Was my inner-beauty so hot and PHat that it was illuminating through my old Aeropostale Tee and hand-me-down, outdated, crop track pants?  Was he still hung-over and horny from the night before and thought that I just looked like a loose-y goosey ?  Or did I look desperate?  Was he a super hero with X-ray vision and liked my chocolate drops?  Sooo many things I wonder, and I will never find out, because, I will make it a point to never talk to this man, unless it’s to say “déjame en paz pervertido!”.

Proceed with caution ladies when you are frumpy and fabulous

About Jeanette 137 Articles
This is me being me so that you will be you. I'm a woman who smiles till my cheeks ache, crochets until my fingers twitch, hugs the hell out of my Hubby and children and in between these things I make the time to read, cook, write and attempt to inspire others to do something to improve their overall health.

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